Life is funny (funny haha, not funny hmm)
I know it happens to everyone. It's common. It's mundane, really. But why is it that when you're about to start a new chapter in your life so many things come into your life to make you rethink just about everything. In the last WEEK I have had new oppurtunities, fears, doubts, buckets of confidence, and sheer happiness thrown my way, and I don't even know what to do with it. I feel like I came into college knowing exactly what I wanted, and I'm leaving without a clue. But I'm happier and much more together than when I've got here. I've learned (finally) what kind of people are healthy for me to be around, and what kind are not.
This blog is going nowhere.
It's just all very confusing. Without all of these new oppurtunities, I'd feel much more calm, but not as energized and amazing.
This is vague huh? Well I taught last week which is the first big thing. I taught a class and I got a high I've never felt before, and then in this past week have been told by practically everyone in that class that I should go into teaching. I also got a paper back on a pathogen that I felt very confident about and thought I knew my shit and got a terrible grade on it. This does not make me feel too great about my ability to write, but more importantly, I've just gotten so comfortable being so good at the science stuff that I don't even remember if I like it anymore...the only time I felt like it was exciting though, was when I was sharing it with others. It's so weird.
Besides that, my "tumor" (haha, no, it wasn't a tumor, i'm being stupid) thing in my neck is actually shrinking. It's just an enlarged lymph node, but the last time I saw a dr. about it (2 weeks ago about) she said that she needed to see me again in a month if things didn't change (which is scary.) But things are a-changing, it's going AWAY. After.....4 months of persisting.
And then there's.....the other thing. I don't know how to feel about it besides really really good. But I'm not ready to tell the world yet. But wow. WOW.
So anyway, when you graduate,, let me know if you feel the same way. It's like life is just handing you the lemonade, instead of the lemons, and you're terribly confused as to what to do with it. =)
Bye
This blog is going nowhere.
It's just all very confusing. Without all of these new oppurtunities, I'd feel much more calm, but not as energized and amazing.
This is vague huh? Well I taught last week which is the first big thing. I taught a class and I got a high I've never felt before, and then in this past week have been told by practically everyone in that class that I should go into teaching. I also got a paper back on a pathogen that I felt very confident about and thought I knew my shit and got a terrible grade on it. This does not make me feel too great about my ability to write, but more importantly, I've just gotten so comfortable being so good at the science stuff that I don't even remember if I like it anymore...the only time I felt like it was exciting though, was when I was sharing it with others. It's so weird.
Besides that, my "tumor" (haha, no, it wasn't a tumor, i'm being stupid) thing in my neck is actually shrinking. It's just an enlarged lymph node, but the last time I saw a dr. about it (2 weeks ago about) she said that she needed to see me again in a month if things didn't change (which is scary.) But things are a-changing, it's going AWAY. After.....4 months of persisting.
And then there's.....the other thing. I don't know how to feel about it besides really really good. But I'm not ready to tell the world yet. But wow. WOW.
So anyway, when you graduate,, let me know if you feel the same way. It's like life is just handing you the lemonade, instead of the lemons, and you're terribly confused as to what to do with it. =)
Bye
posted by Eek! @ 4:22 PM
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